Gack!
It's funny how your mind plays tricks on you and turns unpleasant memories into mush, or turns them into something of beauty. Much like the pain of childbirth. In the beginning, there is NO way you are going to go through that ever again THANK. YOU. VERY. MUCH. Or like the time when your husband put your cashmere sweater into the dryer and when all was said and done, your 6 month old daughter looked adorable in it. Ok, perhaps it took me a lot longer to get over that one, but you get the picture.
What I am talking about here is school, or, to be more specific, getting used to school, and homework, and really mean teachers who do absolutely nothing but yell at you even though you do nothing wrong, and changes, and getting up early...and did I mention really mean teachers? Run-on sentence anyone?
Can you guess who I am referring to? If your answer was Meelie you are correct and you get the prize. Chickie has never had a problem with adjusting. She just kind of goes with the flow. Meelie does not handle change well, at all. She's into structure. And schedules. If you dare waiver from that one iota, she melts down faster than an ice cube in our lovely summer weather here. To be fair, she's gotten much better with a lot of it, but not school.
Every year it's the same thing and I have to keep reminding myself that it WILL get better. The constant whining and crying and making excuses. The not wanting to do homework because it is just too hard. The frustration of having to calm her down and then sit with her to help her, only to find out that once I plant my butt in the chair, she suddenly has a "come to Jesus" moment, and can do it all on her own. Glory be! It wasn't that hard at all.
The stories about how the teachers YELL AT HER ALL THE TIME! I am positive the meanest group of educators all congregated into the 4th grade and they were intent on making Meelie's life absolutely miserable. Of course, it's NEVER her fault. She never talks out of turn, she always pays attention and does whatever she is told to do.
I need to remember that this little child of mine wears her heart on her sleeve. I don't know where she gets that from (hush Mom). One cross-eyed look from a teacher, or a sharp word or two and her whole world is turned completely upside down, and things have a habit of being blown way out of proportion. I think she has gotten into "trouble" (and I use that term loosely...it's all normal stuff) maybe twice but to hear her talk about it, you would think it was all the time. For goodness sake, the Math teacher is a stickler for being organized and remembering to bring your book and all materials to class and won't let you go back to get them if you forget. Imagine that! How horrible of her!
My baby is not organized, but she will learn. I continually remind her that it only gets harder as she progresses so she needs to keep working at it. She continually reminds me that she is just not ready for 4th grade and wants to go back to third. If I were completely honest, there are times when I am ready to agree, just go get past this point.
The hardest thing for me to do is not to cave. Do your homework. You will NOT play until you do your homework. You will read for a half an hour every night. You need to focus. You need to pay attention in class, and make sure you write down all of your assignments. She is capable of all of this. Yes, it's harder for her, but she has come such a long way. We have struggled with this in the past. Each and every year, she proves the teachers wrong and I am determined that we will do it again. Her grades are a testimony to all of her hard work.
I'm proud of her, and I know I will be again this year. We just have to get through the adjustment stage. I just have to reign in my temper enough to gently show her what she needs to do. I need to remind her that she is smart, that she can do this, and that nothing can get in her way. I just have to find a way to make her believe it, and believe in herself.
I will and I know she will. It's just so hard right now because I do not know the words to help her. But I will learn, and so will she.
In the meantime, I live for the day that I can have my little pig headed, demonstrative, funny, delightful, exasperating girl back. Complete with the little curl.
Comments
ROFLMAO!! I can laugh (and I am!!) because I don't have children but your story is really cute... I'm sure it doesn't feel 'cute' to you but I'll bet Miss Meelie is a delight - even thru the hard school-stuff! I recall HATING the 4th grade - so much that I engineered an illness to keep from going... After several weeks, my mom got 'wise' to me (after the trip to the doctor!! Yikes!) and forced me to go. I'm grateful to her - otherwise, would I still be in 4th grade now? Hmmmm....
I'm here from Michele's - wanted to say 'Hello' and thank you for the evening chuckle (at your expense, I'm afraid!)
Posted by: Madseason at August 9, 2007 8:32 PM
What a balanced, level-headed smart mom you are! Seriously. She'll do fine. She has YOU.
Michele says hello!
~S
Posted by: Shephard at August 9, 2007 8:48 PM
Glad Michele sent me here to read about your thoughts about your daughter. Those are so filled with love!
Posted by: gautami at August 9, 2007 8:52 PM
wow...I'm homeschooling my sister and am glad that I will have no more of what you have just described from her. It's really nice 'cause she knows that she can't complain about her teachers...MUAHAHAHA!
Michele sent me to say, "Howdy, neighbor!" or something like that.
Posted by: Leigh in Atlanta at August 9, 2007 10:25 PM
Oh, I have one of those little girls...for me, it's my 6-year-old. Thankfully, this year has gotten off to a fairly calm start, but ordinarily we go into new situations kicking and screaming. The biggest adjustment we're making now is the getting up in the morning without having a meltdown. Some mornings are iffy but they'll get better.
Michele sent me...but after reading around a bit here I am definitely coming back...WHY have I not met you before???
Have an awesome weekend!! :)
Posted by: Jennifer at August 10, 2007 7:59 AM
Your sweet little one reminds me of me when I was at school... I used to do all the same things, and I'm still an expert procrastinator!
I hope things get easier for her. Lucky she's got such a great mum to help her out!
Michele sent me tonight.
Posted by: Yaeli at August 10, 2007 8:39 AM
I identify eith yourt little Meelie...I didn't eat breakfast for twelve years bevause scgool and the teachers made me nervous and I was afraid I would throw up...! The thing is, if she takes things very hard...meaning she is terribly sensitive...these things will seem utterly horrible to her...Man Teavhers, etc....Hope you get through this adjustment period....!
And to answer your question, YES! I performed the ceremony.! And, it is legal, too! (lol)
Posted by: OldOldLady Of The HillsOl at August 10, 2007 9:05 AM
THAT SHOULD BE "MEAN" TEACHERS...I cannot see the letters very well on here till after it is published...Sorry about ALL the mistakes---One Finger Typing, very fast will do this...
Posted by: OldOldLady Of The HillsOl at August 10, 2007 9:07 AM
She is a lucky girl to have such a caring, understanding mum. In years to come - I promise you- she will thank you for it. Carry on:)
Michele says hi!
Posted by: Pat at August 10, 2007 9:16 AM
Okay -- you are getting bookmarked... I just read three posts, and they are
wonderful! And the picture of the fish....
Michele sent me this first time, but I'll be back again using her directions!
N.
Posted by: BreadBox at August 10, 2007 9:54 AM
I so relate to your experience: Laura: in so many ways, you could have been writing about our daughter.
I try to take a forest-and-trees perspective on it. Right now, I'm staring at a tree and I'm feeling a little stressed from what I'm seeing. It's tactical, now. Long-term, the forest looks very lush indeed. It's strategic, long-term...the niggling things that bug her today will gradually give way as she builds the ability - with your help - to handle whatever comes her way.
Everyone else has said it before, but it bears repeating: she'll do fine because she has you. You're a great mom, and you've built a wonderfully strong family. No worries here.
Oh yeah, Michele says hi.
Posted by: Carmi at August 10, 2007 11:02 AM
Michele sent me back to read it again and think about it.
Posted by: gautami at August 10, 2007 12:00 PM
Michele sent me here to read all about your Meelie. I was (am) very sensitive and thought all the teachers were out to get me. I hated all the things that changed and I wasn't very organized. But, I always made really good grades. Good luck!
Posted by: Shoeaddict at August 10, 2007 10:46 PM
Moogie,
There are times when I want to go back to third grade again, but then it was sort of hard. I think that is when I missed learning fractions and have been math impaired ever since. Enjoyed your blog very much this morning.
Posted by: amberstar at August 11, 2007 10:48 AM
Hey Moogie, hmm from what I've just read I'd be willing to bet that you are seeing you in 100% miniature :D *waves to moogie's mom* :)
Am I close, I'll know soon enough no doubt, now where did I put that army surplus helmet, laughs. Yes all kids are like that it's new, it's too hard, the teachers don't like me, I have a nephew who is just like that many things go from \../ to \......................../ size in well about the time it takes to say this sentence. You have that girl back she's just hiding it all somewhere, I'm thinking she' be back around oh end of this term time..
No Michelle didn't sent me I came all on my own are I getting good :P
Posted by: Gopher at August 11, 2007 7:50 PM
