Any one of those things, in and of themselves would be a bummer but no big deal. But to have them happen in a short period of time brought me down a few notches. In my present state of mind, it's difficult to deal with the little stuff. Oddly enough, I can handle the bigger ticket items, to a point.

DJ was a fish that was given to me by a co-worker when I still lived in corporate housing. This was all before the girls, and then ultimately, my husband joined me here in Georgia. For the first year or so, DJ stayed at my desk at work. Cleaning the little tank was a bit of a challenge, but after a few times, I had it down pat. I took him home during the Christmas break and never brought him back. He was a fun fish. Whenever I came home he would shoot up to the top of the tank as if to say, "wooohooo, Mom's home, chow time baby!" It's not as if loosing him tore me a part like it would if I would have lost one of my dogs, but there is still a part of me that is sad when I look at the empty surface that used to hold his tank.

On that same night, I broke the lid to a ceramic bowl that my mom had given me that was my grandmothers. I was very possessive about that bowl, and took extremely good care of it. I opened up the oven to check on the potatoes and when I went to lift the lid, it slipped out of my oven mitt and crashed on the oven door. I completely lost it. I realize it was just a material item, but it had a special meaning to me. Yes, I still have the bottom portion of the bowl, so all is not lost. But it was and is, still hard.

On Monday following the loss of DJ, and the lid, I called my doctor because I still hadn't heard from her. She never did call back on Friday. I was informed that she was out of the office for the entire week. The PA did call me back with the results, which showed "normal" but told me that I should call the doctor next week to see what the next step was. I know that the doctor told me that if my results came back normal, that didn't mean that the numbers used to calculate normal were necessarily "normal" for me. So, again, I wait.

But there is a silver lining in that cloud that seems to be hanging over my head. Tomorrow is Independence Day, and I have the day off from work. My husband is picking up the fireworks as we speak, and I'm sure we'll have some sort of barbeque, perhaps even with the neighbors. It's all good, and I'm fighting to stay upbeat and if I do say so myself, even with the chinks in my armor, I'm doing one H-E-double hockey stick (HI MOM!) of a job.

Have a wonderful 4th of July, for those of you who celebrate, and for those who don't, enjoy your summer day!