May 29, 2007

A little bit goes a long way

On the last 30 minutes of our trek to my parent’s house this weekend, the midget terrorists became restless. The sighs of sheer boredom and the repetitive whining consisting of “she’s touching me” as well as the moans making it perfectly clear that they were going to perish from starvation because “WE HAVE NOT EATEN IN AT LEAST 36 MINUTES!” were about ready to cause my chin and neck hair suddenly sprout up again, even though I had just finished plucking them that morning. I realize that was a run on sentence, but it conveyed my feelings of headimploditis, which, after reading that last sentence is what I’m sure you are experiencing now. Oh, and by the way? “I have to go to the bathroom!”

My eldest daughter suddenly blurted out that there was a cloud that looked like a baby bottle nipple. When I turned my head to get a glimpse of it, I realized she was correct. Not to be outdone, I quickly pointed out the “elephant lying on its back with its trunk up in the air” (hey, I have never been known for my originality). We found a couple more interesting clouds, when Chickie, the fruit of my loins, my first born, and the child I had SO MUCH HOPE FOR, shouted:

”Mom! There’s this cloud over on my side that looks like a giant turd sleeping on a pillow!”

Are we there yet?

Posted by Moogie at 5:50 PM | Comments (5)

May 24, 2007

Managing your time

Let's face it. If I would be completely honest with you, this is not one of my strong points. It desperately needs to be. I am well aware of the fact that because of this fault, I bring a lot of unnecessary stress upon myself. In spite of all of this, I believe that it doesn't preclude me from becoming exponentially aggravated at doctors who are overbooked. Granted, it's not the doctors who make the schedules, but I feel they hold a certain amount of responsibility. Like I'm telling you something you aren't already aware of, I know.

Let me give you an example.

Today, I had a follow-up appointment with my doctor for some blood work I had done. My blood pressure had gone wacky, and they changed my medicine. It's standard procedure for them to do a work up on you whenever they change the meds. I had an appointment at 3:00 this afternoon to go over the results. I didn't even get taken into a room until 3:30. When all was said and done, I didn't get out of there until 4:45.

My normal physician was not there as she had to take early maternity leave because of some problems she was having. That's not a problem as the PA, who I will call AJ, is really good. To make a long story short, the BP was better than it has been for a long time, and everything else looked great. He did agree with me that something needed to be done for my allergies, so he gave me some samples of Singulair. I'm really hoping that will help.

He also discussed with me a drug called Chantix, which will help in my quest to stop smoking. He gave me a rather large booklet that talked about it and told me that when I am ready to quit, I need to make and appointment, and we'll go from there. The nice thing about this is that they don't just give you the drug. They follow up with a lot of phone calls to see how you are doing, and to offer support if you need it. They help you handle all sides of the addiction. Have you, or do you know of anyone, who has used this drug to quit smoking? I'd love to hear your take on it.

Considering my lack of ability to manage time, and doctors who overbook, all is going well. The kids are heading for their last day of school tomorrow and I'm attempting not to get overly emotional about the whole thing. Chickie will be going into 8th grade, which means she is only one more year from high school. I am trying very hard not to think past that, because that is one step closer from her leaving the nest. Overreaction anyone? Lord, my baby is growing up and I don't know how to stop it.

Meelie No, on the other hand, is overstimulated from all of the end of the year activities. Every little thing is a life changing event, and OMG NOTHING WILL EVER BE THE SAME AGAIN AND MY LIFE IS AWFUL BECAUSE THE ONLY WORD YOU KNOW IS NO! That is generally followed by her wish that she belonged to another family. I guess that means I don't have to give her ice cream (more for me!) for dessert. I have to live up to my reputation after all. My husband volunteered to give her a shower, and she has done nothing but SCREAM about how she doesn't NEED a shower, and "Dad, my hair doesn't need to be dried and OMG, why do you keep bothering me about putting underwear on?!"

I really tried to keep this post on topic. The end of school years are always hard on me because that just means that my kids are continuing to grow up, and become closer to not needing me any more. It's a good thing, this developing independence. I know that. But it doesn't make it hurt any less.

Posted by Moogie at 5:19 PM | Comments (9)

Crap

I was on the phone with a supplier. Before I called them, I had just gotten a nice, hot, fresh cup of coffee. We were discussing price and delivery. I took a sip of coffee. It went downhill from there.

The coffee went down the wrong pipe, I started to cough (keep in mind, I'm on the phone with my supplier). I couldn't stop it and had difficulty getting my breath. I threw off my headsets, and kept right on coughing, really heard. When I gasped in some air, it gagged me and made me cough really hard. I puked, and some coffee went out of my nose.

I am wearing white pants and a powder blue shirt.

It can only get better from here, right? RIGHT?

Posted by Moogie at 8:39 AM | Comments (1)

May 22, 2007

Burn baby burn

Clearly, I have been using the microwave for too long. I turned on the wrong burners tonight, and managed to burn the sausage. It's a good thing I have a back up plan.

ICE CREAM! It's not just for dessert anymore.

[side note]Clearly, I jest. No ice cream was served for dinner tonight and all children were served a nutritional dinner.[/end side note]

Lord help me. I shouldn't be allowed around any kitchen items that require you to be able to READ the knobs.

Carry on.

Posted by Moogie at 7:54 PM | Comments (2)

The wheels on the bus go round and round...

For whatever reasons, that song is going through my head and I CAN'T.GET.IT.OUT. Besides that, it has nothing to do with this post.

Now that I have THAT out of the way, and even though the song is still in my head, I thought I'd ramble a bit, with some thoughts that are going through my head.

• It really feels good to be able to cook dinner again, and eat like a real family. I've missed that and find that I'm enjoying actually being able to plan a meal, and carry it through. One thing I love to do is make things up as I go along. It starts with the meat, and I build the dinner around that. What do I have in my fridge? What's in the pantry? The great thing about my husband is that he LOVES my experiments. Chickie, on the other hand, develops mysterious illnesses that suddenly make her stomach hurt. But she's never too sick for ice cream. Sound familiar? Speaking of having the opportunity to eat as a family (woohoo June Cleaver!), my husband just got a "Help me, my computer has fallen and can't get up" phone call from a neighbor. Being the neighborhood IT God, he gets alot of those calls. It's really not a problem. The dinner will be ready for him when he gets home. I'll get the kids fed, and bathed, and when he gets home, I'll lovingly serve him up his food, and then leave him in the dust to go watch American Idol with the girls.
• Speaking of my husband, our anniversary was yesterday. Nineteen years people. Nineteen years. We really didn't do anything special for it as it was a school/work night but it was enjoyable just the same. I got some beautiful flowers, and a card that was so romantic, I had to check to see if it was really my husband that was sitting across from me at the dinner table. We'll most likely go out to dinner this weekend, if things work out, but either way, it was a most enjoyable day.
• I have a question for you. Why is it that when you get a package of something, which has a "tear here" instruction on it, you can never "tear here" and end up getting a pair of scissors or a knife to open up the package. And WHY do the people who make picture frames, put the price sticker on the glass? It's just something for you to ponder and if you have any answers, let me know. I just thought I would throw that in to see if you were paying attention.
• There is a young boy, who likes to hang out with Meelie, that I am having trouble with. His parents are basically non-existent (I will leave it at that) and he lives with his grandparents. In general, he is a pretty good kid but something that happened about two weeks ago, has broken my trust with him. I honestly don't know how I'm going to handle it. His actions caused two other boys to get into alot of trouble with their parents, and have put a strain on Meelie's relationship with them. It hurts to see it, but I'm not sure how to handle it. I put a stop to her hanging out with him for a bit, but have lifted the restrictions somewhat. She was not involved in this incident in any way, shape or form (thank you Lord), but in a round about way, she has been affected by it. I'm not sure whether I need to talk to the parent's of the other two boys involved, to find out if they are not allowed to play with Meelie any more or not. I believe it's most likely caused by the fact that they really don't want their kids playing with this child, and the kids really don't want to hang out with him any more. On the one hand, I would like to tell her that she can't play with him anymore, but on the other hand, I need to trust her to a certain extent He's not a bad kid, he's just lonely and basically unsupervised. His mother is worseless in my book, because as far as she is concerned, whatever her son says is the Gospel. I have NEVER wanted to slap someone in my life before, but this woman comes close. I feel for the boy, I care for him, and my heart goes out to him because he really has no adult to turn to. He has no one to teach him about actions and consequences, and he has become an adept liar. As much as I would like to, and that it would make my life easier, I am not at the point where I can turn my back on him. I just don't know how to deal with it. Do you have any thoughts?

That's about all I have to say for tonight. I need to finish getting dinner ready, and then do the bedtime routine. I live such an exciting life, I know.

I'm off to get everyone ready for the finale of American Idol. Who will be voted off this week? This should be interesting.

Posted by Moogie at 6:25 PM | Comments (3)

May 21, 2007

Transplant Information

In the hospital the relatives gathered in the waiting room, where their family member lay gravely ill.

Finally, the doctor came in looking tired and somber.

"I'm afraid I'm the bearer of bad news," he said as he surveyed the worried faces.

"The only hope left for your loved one at this time is a brain transplant.

It's an experimental procedure, very risky but it is the only hope. Insurance will cover the procedure, but you will have to pay for the brain yourselves."

The family members sat silent as they absorbed the news. After a great length of time, someone asked, "Well, how much does a brain cost?"

The doctor quickly responded, " $5,000 for a male brain, and $200 for a female brain."

The moment turned awkward. Men in the room tried not to smile, avoiding eye contact with the women, but some actually smirked. A man unable to control his curiosity, blurted out the question everyone wanted to ask, "Why is the male brain so much more?"

The doctor smiled at the childish innocence and explained to the entire group, "It's just standard pricing procedure. We have to mark down the price of the female brains, because they've actually been used."

Posted by Moogie at 2:48 PM | Comments (4)

May 18, 2007

ET phone home

Or, why I haven't written in a while and it isn't because of being ill because I have complained enough about that already. I am such a wuss.

I was abducted by aliens. For real! And they looked just like they do on TV. I think their leader was ET's, brother's, sister's, uncle's, cousin's father. There was THAT much family resemblance. I was sitting in my office, writing this thought provoking, gut wrenching, humorous post, when all of a sudden, WHAM! There they were. Standing right in the doorway of my office. If you don't believe me, you can ask my dog, though she might be kind of hard to understand, because ever since the abduction, she's been speaking in tongues. I was so flabbergasted by their unexpected appearance that I accidentally hit the little red "X" up at the top of my screen and lost my award winning post, which would have catapulted me into instantaneous fame. I have no memory as to what happened following their arrival. After they showed up, the next thing I remember was landing with a thud in my office chair, and I was once again, sitting in front of a blank screen. For some reason, I am fighting a most irresistible urge to pick up my cell phone and dial random numbers, while shouting things like "can you hear me now?"

Pardon me while I go take my medicine now. The voices in my head. They are so very loud!

N-EEE-WAY!!!

With all the alien excitement, loosing my post type stuff going on I don't think that I have mentioned that there is only one more week of school. Not that I would have had any chance in Hades of forgetting it because each and every day, I have been reminded that my children are almost free. Meelie No informed me just how relieved she is, because after all, school is so boring. All you do every day is learn. I didn't realize just how hard it has been for her, bless her heart.

With the end of school drawing near, I feel the need to confess that I have done nothing in regards to figuring out just what it is my kids will be doing over the summer. I've thought about it, but most of the camps out there are cost prohibitive, as well as being impossible to coordinate due to both parents working full time. While we could most likely handle the economic side of things, the hours make it a complete no-go. Would any of you like to come and babysit for the summer? I promise you that you will not have to clean any guinea pig or hamster cages, scrub out fish tanks, nor take on the daunting task of pooper-scooper duty as a result of having three dogs. Oh, and as an added bonus, all my dogs are people friendly, and if you don't mind a dog speaking in tongues, you'll do fine.

Along with the end of school, comes the "BIG RECITAL." This is the performance that Chickie has been working hard on all year. She will be performing in six pieces. SIX. Count them. She has more costume changes than Carter had liver pills, and don't get me started on the hair styles and head pieces. This year, they are going to have "helpers" in the dressing rooms. I'm hoping that everything will work out. As a mother, I am most anxious for her, but she is so excited and confident, mixed with just the right amount of nervousness that I can't help but be caught up in the moment. I know that she will do fine. More than fine actually, but I still worry. All of this is happening Saturday.

In many ways, these last few weeks have been crazy, which one would expect. It seems to me as though everything is happening at once. At the same time, there is a sense of winding down. I get all warm and fuzzy at the thought of actually sitting down as a family and eating dinner that doesn't come out of a box or can, and doesn't need to be microwaved after careful ventilation of the film cover. I'm not sure I even remember how to use my oven anymore.

As for right now? It's time for me to pick up the camera and go take some photos of my children and their friends, doing death defying stunts on the trampoline. Right after a couple of shots of whiskey to calm my nerves.

If you are still with me, I'll leave you with something that is bound make you smile. Go to the extended entry and have a look.

Becca, not nearly as good as yours, but it's close.

Posted by Moogie at 3:25 PM | Comments (2)

May 15, 2007

I have a question...or three

Why do doctors never call you back? I just took the last dose of my antibiotics and I have seen no improvement. Granted, my ears did pop a couple of times today, but my feeling of euphoria was short lived. I think my body does stuff like this just to mess with my mind. I called the doctor on Monday, and left a message to have her call me back, but as of this afternoon, two days later, I have heard nothing.

What was that? What did you say? Sorry, but you will have to speak up because I am not hearing very well these days. No, I didn't call her again today, but that's beside the point. You are not allowed to ask that question because you are supposed to be on my side and feel sorry for me. Let me feel the love, people.

The lack of hearing, while not terminal, is vastly irritating. My equilibrium is on the fritz, and I have to be very careful at just how fast I move. I'm trying hard not to do a header on any surface. Feeling this way drives me absolutely nuts. The queasiness is difficult to combat. I know I have to eat, because if I don't, the medicine will make me that much sicker. It's a catch-22 I guess.

Does anyone have any cheese to go along with my whine?

On another note, it seems that my "comment" section has now somehow defaulted to "approval needed." When you guys try to comment, do you get the message that I need to approve comments before they will be posted? That throws me, because if you look at my settings, that’s not what is supposed to be happening. I was also told by one of my readers, that there is a possibility of an error message. I tried to duplicate it in both Firefox and IE, but couldn't. Do any of you have this problem? It all seems to be working well, both at home and at work, so I'm at a loss as to what is going on.

I do apologize for the lack of posting as of late. I am generally just too wiped out when I get home from work and the last thing I want to do is look at the computer. Tomorrow, I'll call the doctor again, and remind myself to be kind to the receptionist. It's not her fault her boss doesn't call me back.

Tell me something funny today. Help me pull myself out of this funk. It can be a funny story, or a joke. You can even ask me a question. No holds barred. Something that will make me smile or think about something else. You get extra points if you make me laugh out loud. Leave it in the comments, or drop me a line via email. Who knows, I may even write a post about it.

And I can tell that thrills you to death.

Posted by Moogie at 5:06 PM | Comments (6)

May 8, 2007

Still standing

Tired of being sick.
Tired of not being able to hear.
Tired of out of control blood pressure.
Tired of feeling tired.

One day at a time.
Just one day at a time.
Tomorrow is another day.

Posted by Moogie at 5:35 PM | Comments (8)