Kids growing up I mean. With growing (not just physical), comes some pretty difficult times for parents, who's job it is to make sure their kids know right from wrong, and to know what dangers are out there, waiting to snatch them in the sharp, mangled claws known as life. It's our job to help them through the difficult parts, the hurts and the sorrows, as well as to celebrate with them during all of the good times. It's our job to be their never-ending cheerleader if you will, and to love them unconditionally, and to make sure that they always know that we are there for them, no matter what.

I read a post by Amalah today that really hit home for me. It's articulated well, and I suspect that many of you out there that have children can really relate.

One day, very soon, it will take a lot more than that. I'll have to explain why we have bad dreams and why we get sick; why people are cruel and why people we love sometimes die. I'll have to explain why we don't say certain words and figure out what to tell him about the book of Bible stories on his shelf.

I don't what I'm going to say when that day comes, so in a way it's comforting to tell myself that he's just not talking yet.

I remember worrying about that. What will I do when???? I don't think any of us know for certain, but we rely on our instincts to guide us. We may make some mistakes along the way, but we are trying to do our best, and I can't help but feel the majority of us learn from it. I know that I've grown up alot since having children. The responsibilities, the joys and the heartaches are endless, as well as the guilt. In my case, are my children getting enough from me because I work? Do I spend enough time with them? Do I pay enough attention to them? Am I really there for them when they need it? Am I showing more attention to one child?

As time has passed, I've learned that my children really have learned all of my buttons, and exactly how to push them, and at what time to get the desired results. It's a kid's job to know that, don't you know? I did the same thing to my parents as well.

I have news for Amalah and all of the other parents out there of small children. It never stops, it only changes, and sometimes, the job of parenting can absolutely break your heart. The whole idea of discipline can sometimes kill me. Even though what you are doing is for the best for your child because after all, if you don't teach them that there are consequences to their actions, how will they ever learn?

If this doesn't happen, then this will.

How often have we said this to our children? How often have we caved into their demands or ignored their misbehavior because we didn't want to induce a tantrum or be subject to pouting and "spur of the moment hatred" when we don't give them what they want? How often have we said to our children:

"I know you are mad at me right now, but you knew when you did this, there would be consequences to pay. I am doing it not because I hate you or want to ruin your life, but because I want you to grow up to be a child who takes responsibilities, and who has a clear vision of what is right and what is wrong. I want you to be a better person that I was. I want you to avoid the mistakes I made growing up."

In reality, they have to make mistakes in order to learn.

They say as children get older and move towards being an adult, it becomes easier but the worry never ceases. I can believe that. I've read and heard about countless families with a number of children, all of them raised the same way. If you are lucky, they all turn out to be productive members of society, but in alot of cases, there are the proverbial "black sheep" of the family. Exactly how that happens, I'm not sure, but it's a fact of life, non-the-less.

This parenting thing? It's the hardest job I've ever had, and I suspect that will never change.